Brought to you by the letter S

as in snow on the ground when I woke up this morning.

as in sucks to find snow on the ground on April 4.

as in shoes which I sorely need to buy.

as in shopping which is what I needed to do, but instead I watched TV.

as in stupid which is what I am for forgetting to take the calibration, book the stage, and bring the books home for Sunday.

as in Sunday School which I should be preparing for.

as in sex which is what my husband and I should be having, but we aren’t.

as in sorry for not having sex with my husband.

as in sleepy.

Trip to the Orchestra

Dear BMC,

Thank you so much for providing an experience of culture for the children of Windham County. Being able to accompany my First and Second Graders to Ferdinand the Bull was wonderful. Each of my students were enthralled with the concert. The narrator and conductor made it so easy to understand and enjoy. I know they will talk about it for months. Thank you again for enriching our lives.

Happy Small Town Teacher

Dear Freakin’ Bus Company,

Thank you for nearly ruining a wonderful day for 40 first and second graders and their teachers. We were ready at 5 of 9:00, with our coats on and in our groups, to get on the bus and head into town for the show. The kids were so excited to go see Ferdinand the Bull in concert. We lined up in the hallway and our music teacher went out to get the bus – which had been sitting in the parking lot since the kids were dropped off – to pull around to the front door. Instead she watched as it pulled out of the parking lot and down the road.

Dear Bus Company, why when we called to find out why the bus left us did you say “she is on her way”? Obviously she wasn’t, since she was headed away from the school. Why did you let 40 kids and their teachers stand in the hallway for 20 minutes waiting for the bus afraid they would miss the show? Why if on Monday the dispatcher knew we had booked a bus, on Thursday did no one realize?

And why do you keep doing this to us? If this wasn’t bad enough, it was the 3rd time in less than a year. Last spring you kept the third graders waiting and this fall the second graders. Not to mention all the times this year you have only sent 2 of our 3 buses at the end of the day. Do you know how hard it is to scramble and figure out how to send little kids home on different buses.

Thank you for owning up to your “mistake” today and refunding our bus money. We enjoyed the show, no thanks to you. Maybe you should learn how to run a business. Jerks.

Disgruntled Small Town Teacher

Dear Mr. Sunshine

Dear Mr. Sunshine,

Thank you for coming out to visit today. I feel like it has been a very long time since I have seen you and felt your warmth. Please feel free to stay around a while and visit.

There are so many things you have missed out on since you were gone. We have had too many snowstorms to count. We have had 4 snow days this year and will have to make one up in May or June. All this snow, sleet, and ice make me wanna say “Global warming – ha!”, but I guess that would be like saying “Round Earth, yeah right”. Damn those scientists always knowing stuff.

If a tree falls in your yard... Oh…where was I? You missed the tree in our yard splitting and falling over. It was a lovely tree. I am very sad that it will have to be cut away. You may remember that one of the first years we lived in our house two of the branches fell off.  It was such a perfect tree before and now… All that’s left is a big section over the driveway.  I am afraid it will fall on a car.  Please let it be warm so the snow will melt.

The crocuses are blooming in our garden.  Thank you for bringing them light and nutrients so they may grow and bring signs of spring.  I can see the daffodils popping out.  I can’t wait to see more flowers blooming.

Next step, barefoot in the yard!
Lady S

I thought this was such a funny quiz I had to try it for myself! Thanks Toddled Dredge!

My husband and friends will agree it is totally accurate!  And?  I actually use dashes in my speech and writing, so that is too funny!  Although, I hate public speaking!

You Are An Exclamation Point

You are a bundle of… well, something.
You’re often a bundle of joy, passion, or drama.You’re loud, brash, and outgoing. If you think it, you say it.

Definitely not the quiet type, you really don’t keep a lot to yourself.

You’re lively and inspiring. People love to be around your energy.

(But they do secretly worry that you’ll spill their secrets without even realizing it.)

You excel in: Public speaking

You get along best with: the Dash

What Punctuation Mark Are You?

A letter to my parents

April 1, 1966 Dear Mom and Dad,

Happy 42 anniversary. Who gets married on April Fool’s day? My parents of course. What is it you say, Dad? When else should you get married?

What a small simple wedding you had. How times have changed. Here we are planning Mooch’s wedding…in 6 months no less…and inviting more people than you probably even knew when you got married.

Did you know, at 19 and 25, that you would still be together 42 years later?  With 2 grown daughters?  You probably thought we would be older than we are, but God had other plans.  7 homes in your first 5 years of marriage and a different job in each place.  Finally settling in Brattleboro, because of Unka.  Better than Cleveland I suppose.

All those hours at the store.  You guys knew everyone.  And they still know you.  How many shelves did you fill?  Bottles did you sort?  Deer did you check in?  How did you stand it, working together all the time?  How do you stand it now?  I know…Dad would say Mom is always within striking distance.

You guys have certainly been good role models as a married couple. You showed us it is okay to disagree, but you never really fought. You let us know we should take time for ourselves but to spend time with the ones you love.

You gave us religion, education, travel, culture, nice teeth, love, support, and freedom.

Here’s to another 42 years together.

Big D

April 1, 1966